O – Outsider

I am an outsider in every definition of the word.
There is no place for me to fit in or that I can find anyone similar to me.
I’m not wildly popular, but I am well known.
I am both loved and hated, but still I’m mostly alone.
I have black friends and white friends, and of all other races.
But for each friend I have, an enemy lies in wait.
I have geek tendencies but I’m not quite nerdy enough.
I have a freak within me, but I think I’m sexually inept.
I’m a tomboy, who loves sports and doesn’t mind a drink or two
But I’m still a girl who desires all of the girly girl things of the world.

I don’t have a group or a place I can run to when everything’s going wrong.
No one understands me, or no one seems to care at all.
I’ve watched people get married, have kids and be happy,
I’ve watched people have kids, run tricks and well you know the rest of that.
I live in the hood, but I’m not of the hood
I can be many things, but loyal and faithful is what I remain to a fault
Although I’m sure I can share my feelings, it’s not the same when it’s not personal
Because I’ve freely given this heart and had it torn apart before.

So I don’t fit in with people, I don’t fit in with love.
I didn’t fit in at church, but I don’t fit in with the secular neither.
So what is a true outsider to do, when all else seems to fall flat.
Remain an outsider…

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