Alter Ego – Chapter 6

Leanna was at a loss for words. Her body craved him from the moment she laid eyes on him. But this was not the way she intended to start this thing off. “I think I may have came off a little stronger in my texts than I meant to. I don’t wanna mislead you.” Bitch! What are you doing?

“Oh,” he responded.

There was a short awkward silence and Leanna was sure that she had just messed up her chances. “I’m sorry to have wasted your time,” she responded after a few more moments. She was prepated to have him stop talking to her and end it like that.

“No, you’re all right. Do you still want me to come through? We can watch a movie, talk; get to know each other better.”

Her eyes lit up. Nakia even jumped up.  This might work out in my favor after all. There’s still an entire night to drop hints. I just need to pull on the proper strings to get Leanna to wear something, revealing. He already saw her beauty… think Nakia, think. I wonder if I tug a little on this part of her conscious will she…


Alter Ego – Chapter 5

She stopped at the gas station to fill up prior to hitting the highway home. She was at a quarter of a tank but knew it would get cold overnight and didn’t want the possibility of her tank freezing. The BP was popping, men were stunting in their clean ass rides and the women were showing off their fits.  Someone is getting chose. She chuckled to herself. Leanna stuck the nozzle in her tank and let it fill up. As she waited, the man on the other side of the pump struck up conversation with her.

“Saw you dancing at the club tonight. You got some pretty nice moves. Homeboy was feeling you too. I see he failed. Maybe you should let me holler at you.”

Midstream, Leanna stopped the pump, replaced the nozzle and got back in the car. She didn’t address him at all. On the drive home, all she could think about was Dedrick. She didn’t usually believe in love at first site, choosing to see it strictly as lust. However, the feeling she got was different this time.

Text him, the nastiest thing you can think of. No maam. I will be quite respectful and reserved. I don’t need those problems this evening. I thought you wanted to be something magnificent Leanna? You scared now? Just give me completely control for an hour. I can’t do an hour. I’ll give you 20 minutes. That’s more than enough time. Pull over the next chance you get, let me text him for you.

Defiant. Leanna drove straight home. She sat in the car in her driveway for a few minutes before she relinquished her power to Nakia. About time.

The seed was about to blossom. Nakia took Leanna’s cellphone and sent a series of texts. They started off respectful and playful. He responded accordingly and threw a few flirty messages out there. By the end of the night, Nakia successfully convinced Dedrick to come over “just to talk.” Then she gave consciousness back to Leanna.

 That wasn’t so bad now was it?

Leanna looked over her text messages and screamed. “Oh my God. He’s going to think I’m some type of loose woman. The hell did you do Nakia?” What you wouldn’t. Closed mouths don’t get fed. He wants it, you want it, shit you NEED it. “I’m going to nip this in the bud.”

Leanna pressed his name and his number appeared on the dial pad. Before she could hit talk, her phone lit up; he was calling her. The sound of her heart racing was pounding in her ears. She was at an impasse with her thoughts; still she consciously answered the phone.

“Good late night, sir.”

“Good late night, maam. Did you still want me to drop by?”

Now was her chance to reneg. She could blame it on the alcohol or act like she was just testing him to see where his head was. “I mean, it’s really late and I shouldn’t have invited you over. The only things open this late are Walmart, IHop and legs.”

He chuckled. “We can go two for three.”

“I don’t follow you.”

“I can make at least two of those things work in your favor.”

Alter Ego – Chapter 4

Dedrick was in a trance when he saw her. Twice in one day, can’t be a coincidence. Leanna was her name right?

He was hyping himself up to approach her when the DJ played Beyoncé’s “Get Me Bodied.” Her attention immediately turned to the open floor and she began to lead the dance. A couple of other women joined her and they began doing the video choreography. And he could tell that she was thoroughly enjoying herself. He watched with a smile, waiting for the opportune time to sneak a dance in with her. He found his chance as he danced towards her right as the lyrics hit: “Baby all I want, is to let it go. Ain’t no worries no…”

He snuck in between the girl that was dancing with Leanna and took over. He matched her perfectly. He caught on quickly and they danced the rest of the duration. Everyone watched their rhythm and their vibe, moving away to give them space. The DJ extended the song an extra three minutes and neither Dedrick or Leanna realized the song had long ended. They fed off of each other’s energy.

“Excuse me fella,” a husky voice disrupted their dance. “You done finished your dance. She needs to return to where she came from and who she came with.”

Dedrick didn’t respond, but he felt his heart drop into his stomach. “My bad, I didn’t know.”

“I didn’t come with anyone. I showed up here by myself and you invited me in to be at all VIP table,” her voice was soft yet stern and full of warning. “You could have left me outside and I’d still get in.”

The man eyeballed Leanna, undecided on the next course of action to take. “So you were in it for a free drink?” the man asked. He grabbed a glass of alcohol from one of the servers as they were going to the table to deliver it and attempted to throw it at Leanna. Luckily, Nakia was in play and already had the jump on dude. She slid three steps to the left, narrowly missing getting hit. Before she could react, security surrounded them. The commotion had caused the DJ to quit playing music for about 20 minutes.

They gently removed the man from the club and Leanna headed back to the bar for another drink. Dedrick followed closely behind, unsure of how to introduce himself.

He took a deep breath and swallowed before saying, “Mrs. Jackson,” he paused.

“My last name is Abraham.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, you look like my future wife.”

She rolled her eyes and shook her head while smiling at his attempted pick up line. “I’m Leanna,” she spoke.

“I’m Dedrick. You look great.”

“As do you.”

Then there was silence. What direction was it supposed to head in? The night was too young and the liquor had Leanna feeling reckless which was leaning into wild thoughts. She had to quickly get composure or she might end up saying something she would have reserved for later on as they knew each other better.

“Let me get a shot of whisky and a Long Beach for her,” he said to the bartender.

“How’d you know what I was drinking on? Were you watching me drink earlier?” She asked half jokingly-half accusingly.

“I could tell by your demeanor that you came to have fun and not to get too messed up. You look like you can handle your liquor well, so I just assumed. I’m sorry if I offended.”

“No offense occurred. It was just odd. I have friends that have known me all our lives that can’t even guess my top three drinks of choice. Now here you come guessing correctly off top.”

This may be premature, the night is still young, I should try to get her back to my house. I got to know what she’s working with in the bedroom. But I ain’t tryna be a creep. How do I make it her idea? He pondered.

“It would never be my idea if you already thought about it, sir,” She said as if she read his mind. He snapped out of his thoughts to see a smiling Leanna looking him up and down.

“Excuse me?”

“It was written on your face. Where do we go from here? You want me to come back to the house so you can put it down. You’re curious because this dress is just long enough, this V-neck cut is just revealing enough, the scent flowing from my body is just sweet enough.” She teased his senses and watched him silently fight off his arousal. She leaned into, taking in a huge whiff of his cologne. Now it was her turn to drift to a place she couldn’t truly be.

He leaned down and whispered in her ear, “I don’t ever worry about where we go from here. Either you’re coming with me or I’m coming with you. You can take it how you want to. And I mean all of that.”

“I believe in the power of threes,” she retorted. “The universe will let me know if this was meant to be or not. How much do I owe you for the drink?”

He was taken aback. He’s heard no before, but not from someone who was mutually interested in him. “Nothing, the pleasure was all mine.”

“Maybe someday soon, the pleasure will be both of ours. I hope to see you again soon. If not, it was nice to meet you Dedrick.” Then she headed for the exit. When she got to her car it was 1:15am. As she opened the door, Dedrick was right behind her. “Oh shit!” she yelled out, scared half to death.

“I’m sorry Leanna. I couldn’t let you leave without giving you my number or at least getting yours.”

“I wasn’t intending on taking…” her voice trailed off. Nakia took over for the duration of the conversation. This is what you want, stop acting like a fucking prude. “I mean, sure why not. Hit me up when you leave the club. I should still be awake.” That’s a fucking set up Nakia. What do I look like waiting up for a man to call? “You won’t be awake. But you gotta pretend to be that interested. He’ll text to see if you’re up and possibly tell you how he noticed you earlier while he was at work and tried to catch you or some crazy shit. I got this Leanna, let me do us for you. Okay, but I’m not trying to have sex with him and I feel like that the direction you’re heading. 

They exchanged numbers and bid each other farewell before Dedrick closed the door after helping her get into her car. He waited as she started her call and pulled up to the light before he headed back inside to his entourage. There’s something about that girl.

“Dee, where’d you go? Did you get ol girl’s number at least? I thought for sure that was another one for you.”

He just shook his head, acknowledging he heard him but dismissing the conversation. He was still replaying her words to him. What started off as a lustful approach, ended in something different. He couldn’t quite put his finger on it. But his time to think about her was coming to an end. Within a few minutes his phone rang.

RING! “Hello?”

“What time you bringing your black ass home? Who told you to go to the club in my shit anyways? You always use me and my shit but don’t wanna be around me. Why don’t you go be with whatever bitch you found and use her. I’m done with your punk ass. Bring me my shit back and get the fuck out my crib.” CLICK!

He let out a deep guttural sigh and headed back to his group of friends. It was the same thing every night. She would always trip about him going out. Yeah, he met a chick or two that made him stop wanting to deal with her, but he came home every night to her. He had been stopped having sex with her. Maybe she knew he was half way in and half way out; that’s why she exploded. Or maybe she was tripping like she always does. All he had to do was dick her down one good time and she’d be all right for the next few weeks. Dedrick really thought about how to get out of her house. This time, he chose to put a chick’s number to good use.

Alter Ego – Chapter 3

Play it cool Leanna, you probably won’t see him again, but you know you got the juice sis. I know you felt him look into your soul. I even imprinted on him sis. He’s gonna always remember us.

“But who are you?” Leanna finally asked herself out loud. “Am I going crazy? Nah, I got to be going crazy. I’m fucking talking to myself in the parking lot.”

Nah, you’re talking to the you that you should be showing the world. Not this meek, lowly, quiet mouse that allows people to walk all over her. I’ve let you hold the reins for far too long. We about to fuck some shit up tonight, sis.

And for a moment, Leanna was ready to release the control she thought she had over her life. Even if just for some temporary fun. “What do I call you?”

I’m a part of you. I have no name.

“Nakia,” Leanna named her newly found voice. “Well Nakia, let’s go get ourselves together for a night out on the town. We got everything we came for and we’re going to look fabulous.” She smiled brightly; a few men’s heads turned to see the curvature of her lips. One even tipped his head in her direction. Hey, I still got it, she thought independently of Nakia. Wait, how come Nakia isn’t intercepting my thoughts?

She shook off the thought and got ready for her evening of fun. Her girls were all busy and while that usually keeps her in for the night, Leanna was definitely feeling herself. A new found confidence was consuming her very fiber.

9pm – She indulged herself in her jacuzzi tub. She lit a few teacup candles around the tub and bubbles in the water. She made the water as hot as she could tolerate it and just soaked until the water became room temperature. Wasteful as it was, she then hopped into the shower and washed the suds from her body; spread the dove body soap all over and rinsed off.

10:30pm – Dressed in all black like The Omen. Light natural-colored make up, silver dangling earrings, silver rings and bracelets, six-inch stilettos and underneath she wore the red bra and panty set she got from Victoria’s Secret. As she headed out the door, she grabbed her new perfume and gave a few sprays over herself, careful to not overindulge in its strong scent.

11:15pm – Pulled up to the club; fashionably late. She was going to get all the attention this night. She walked to the line and every head within two feet of her turned. They gave her the once over; men continued to look despite their girls being with them. Her dress fell just below the cuff of her cusp of her ass. Her thighs glistened under the light poles. The v-cut neckline showed off her top cleavage, which was teased by a single silver medallion necklace. A small group of 30somethings walked past the line to the front; obviously VIP status; but before they got there, the invited 5 young ladies to join them.  Now’s your chance, Nakia encouraged Leanna. Leanna conveniently stepped forward in the line of sight of the last three men. They got a glance of her legs and she got chosen.

11:30pm – Sitting in VIP with some strangers, but not really feeling it. “Hey, I’ma go grab a drink,” Leanna says to one of the men. He pulled out $100 and told her to order a round of whisky shots for everyone, while whispering for her to keep the change as he winked at her. Knowing that she was being watched, she swayed her hips from side to side as she sauntered towards the bartenders. She ordered for the table and told the bartender which VIP section it was for. Leanna grabbed her Long Beach and made her way to the dance floor. She wasn’t big on dancing but Nakia had her feeling brave.

She drank her drink as fast as she could and sat it on a nearby table. She lingered around the dancefloor until some music that she felt comfortable with came on.

Midnight – The DJ put on the Cha Cha Slide, followed by the Cupid Shuffle, Excuse Me Miss by Chris Brown and finally Can’t Get Enough by Tamia. Leanna line danced for the next 20 minutes straight. Just as she was cooling down, she noticed a group of men walk in. There was three of them, they looked like they were fresh out the store; the men were so clean. The guy in the middle made eye contact with her and the feeling she had experienced early that day came flooding back to her. Her heart raced upon seeing the familiar stranger from Sears. He’s still super fine. I should walk up and… her own thoughts were interrupted by Nakia. No, we don’t walk up to anyone. Let him come to you. Or wait for the perfect song that’ll make y’all connect anyway.

It was like Nakia knew the DJ personally. “Nine four eight one…”

A devilish smirk crossed Leanna’s face.

Alter Ego – Chapter 2

It was another long and tedious day at work. Dedrick had become used to the same mundane and repetitious flow at work. Nothing out of the ordinary ever happened. As supervisor at Sears, he walked the floor from corner to corner, making sure to greet customers when he saw them and to speak to every employee he encountered. He was perfect with remembering names and finite details about his employees that would seem trivial to others. But his repertoire with them made them work more efficiently and the sales numbers backed them up.

Aside from his managerial duties, Dedrick was fairly quiet and kept to himself. He was an attractive, statuesque and nicely chiseled man. When he smiled, the room brightened in even the most well lit areas. His female employees often found themselves in awe of him, and his male employees reveled in jealousy but always acted smartly because they recognized the Alpha in him. Not much made him move. And after all the uneventful day he had been having, Dedrick was ready to punch the clock and go home.

As he made one of his many rounds, he came to the entrance and saw a woman walking towards the store. She was cute from the distance, but he shrugged it off and continued his way around the store. He snuck between the walls and made his way to the guys who pick up and move items to customer’s cars. They were unusually busy and was only able to catch one sitting down on the job. I won’t mess with him today, they’ve been moving like crazy. From there, he went into the HR office and sat at his desk for a few.

Not one to sit still for long, he moved over to loss prevention. The guys were looking at different cameras in all the departments and listening to the radio when Dedrick walked in. 

“What’s going on boss?” one of the men addressed him.

“Restless. The downfall of being too organized and having things in order is boredom.” They all shared a laugh. As they were coming down off their laughs, a beautiful woman graced the cameras and it caught Dedrick’s attention. She was speaking with the sales associate at the perfume counter and left with three swatches; no perfume though. Maybe I can convince her to get something, he thought to himself. “All right fellas, keep up the good work.” Then they all bid each other farewell.

He came out of the loss prevention office, hustled passed his office and made it to the HR door. As he opened it and walked out, he was caught off guard by the woman he seen on the cameras. She was sitting in a chair near the office. He looked at her as she looked up at him, then she returned her gaze to her phone. He snuck a second look immediately, forgetting why he had wanted to catch her previously. He had a hard time ignoring a slight spark he felt surge through him. Did I really feel that? I wonder if she felt it to. Let me walk it off. He made his rounds through tools, to gardening furniture and through the rest of the stores, never looking back in her direction. He missed her glance turn into a watch, admiring the figure before her. 

When Dedrick returned to the HR office she was gone. He kicked himself for not getting her name and not promoting his sales associate as an expert in her field to make the sales. Everything was all bad. But, he chucked it up as a missed encounter. He had other things to worry about at home than to be even entertaining a woman. That didn’t stop his mind from drifting, however. As he opened the door to HR, there were several smiling faces awaiting him. Curiously, he looked at each one of them, trying to figure out if he was about to get a positive or negative surprise.

“You know there’s eyes everywhere, right Dee?” one of the LP guys stated. A chorus of laughter erupted around them. Dedrick even managed a smirk.


“She was pretty cute if you ask us,” he said with a shrug. “Funny thing is, she watched you walk away, well after you hit that corner going to softlines. Then she went back to the perfume counter and bought something.”

Dedrick’s face flushed bright red. Had he been a lighter toned man, he would have been given away. He secretly smiled though, it had been a long time since he’d felt mutual admiration for and from someone. And he didn’t even have to intervene or convince her to buy anything. Still didn’t catch her name though.

“Also,” someone else spoke up, “that sales associate and her know each other. There’s a camera that captures audio over there and we could hear them reminiscing about the past. Not sure if this is the venue or whatnot, but her name is Leanna.”

And now I have a name.

Alter Ego: Chapter 1

Leanna had been a shy person for most of her life; quiet and pretty reserved. She was accustomed to hearing the word “no” from all over that at one point, she just quit asking. Yeah, yeah she knew. “The answer is always no if you never ask.” Hell the answer was always no when she did ask. There was no fucking difference. She spent a majority of her life just accepting what was handed to her.

That was, until the day she was struck with a severe case of fuck it.

Strolling through the mall, Leanna was hit with a sudden revelation. She was content with her life, but she wasn’t where she wanted to be. She wasn’t sad, but she wasn’t happy. She needed to regain control of her life. She needed a definitive change, and she needed that shit to happen right now.

“Grab some foundation, concealer, eye shadow, eye liner, lip liner and some lip gloss from Sephora,” a voice said within her. “Don’t forget to stop at Victoria’s Secret and grab you a matching bra and panty set; red. Get a little black dress and some stilettos. We can afford it. We deserve it.”

“Yeah, we do. I’ve been holding back for way too long.”

“Stop at Sears,” the voice continued, “and grab some perfume. Your homegirl from school works there and you know she’ll hook you up.”

A plan was devised from an unrecognizable voice, and something within her body spurred a significant but unseen change. There was a slightly gleeful bounce in her step. She bore a bright smile across her face as if a moment of clarity had encompassed her entire being. The calm spread across her. She completed all but one of her tasks. Sears was the last thing she needed to stop at.

She made her way to Sears and perused the store. Her girl was working and suggested a few perfumes. She sprayed several swatches and left them for Leanna to smell. Indecisive, she told her girl she’d be back, and walked around the store trying to decide. Her trip took her all the way to the back of the store near the paint department; which was nestled between the patio furniture section and tools department. There won’t be any help from any of these old ass men, she thought to herself. But she sorely needed the opinions of someone of the opposite sex.

Just as she had all but given up, a glimmer of light came through. As she sat in a chair, sniffing the swatches, something like a black Adonis came into view. A door next to her opened and she looked up. They caught and held each other’s eyes for a brief second before Leanna returned her gaze to her swatches. Within a few mere seconds, she caught herself double-taking in admiration of the specimen that came from the room. As she grabbed another 5 to 10 second view, she absorbed his majestic being in her subconscious. He was perfect. She had never saw anyone as fine as him. I’m glad I got to see that. I doubt I’ll ever see his fine ass again, but I’m glad I got to get a glimpse. As quickly as he appeared was as quickly as she pushed him to the back of her mind. I’m out of my league with that one.

“Pick the second one,” the inner voice spoke again, not nearly as softly as it had been in previous conversation. Leanna shrugged and waltzed back to the perfume counter. She secretly hoped to catch a view of the stranger again but was disappointed to not cross his path again. She purchased the scent and walked back through the mall to get to her car.

Little did she know, she was being watched.

Situations 2: Jaded Ambitions Review

I’ve been patiently waiting to write a review about Author James D Sanders’s newest novel, Situations 2: Jaded Ambitions. After a four-year hiatus, James Sanders came back strong with the follow up to Situations.

An urban street lit, Situations 2 picks up right where the prequel left off. We find that Dee is adjusting to being “out the game.” He’s trying to do the family thing; for both his girl’s and his sake. But when Jay is attacked and on the verge of death, Dee gets thrown back into the mix.

Where do I begin? I loved it! This was the first book I’ve read in a long time where I didn’t “figure it out” from jump. The twists, the turns, the feel was all real. Without giving away any spoilers, this book is even more intense than the first. You get to see the prosperity and growth of characters, the unquestionable loyalty that gets rewarded and the betrayal that undoubtedly resides in all things involving the game and money.

I read the book twice in one day, once for pleasure and the other time to make sure I didn’t miss any hints or clues that I should have picked up. It’ll be very interesting to see a follow up or a prequel to this book. I’d love to see how it all began and where Jay and Dee come from, childhood wise.

I give it 5/5 – follow Mr. Sanders at You can cop his e-book or the paperback for both Situations 1 and Situations: Jaded Ambitions on his site or on amazon.

Black History Month – Day 29 – Conclusion

Black-Power-Pan-African-Flag-LORD WHY DID YOU MAKE ME BLACK
Lord, Lord,
Why did You make me Black?
Why did You make me someone
The world wants to hold back?

Black is the color of dirty clothes;
The color of grimy hands and feet.
Black is the color of darkness;
The color of tire-beaten streets.

Why did you give me thick lips,
A broad nose and kinky hair?
Why did You make me someone
Who receives the hatred stare?

Black is the color of a bruised eye
When somebody gets hurt.
Black is the color of darkness.
Black is the color of dirt.

How come my eyes are brown and not
the color of the daylight sky?
Why do people think I’m useless?
How come I feel so used?
Why do some people see my skin
and think I should be abused?

Lord, I just don’t understand;
What is it about my skin?
Why do some people want to hate me
And not know the person within?

Black is what people are “listed,”
When others want to keep them away.
Black is the color of shadows cast.
Black is the end of the day.

Lord, You know, my own people mistreat me;
And I know this isn’t right.
They don’t like my hair or the way I look
They say I’m too dark or too darn light.

Lord, Don’t You think it’s time
For You to make a change?
Why don’t You redo creation
And make everyone the same?

God answered saying
Why did I make you black,
You have the audacity to ask?
I did not do it as a joke,
Or as some cruel task.

Get off your knees and look around.
Tell Me, what do you see?
I didn’t make you in the image of darkness.
I made you in the Likeness of Me!

I made you the color of coal
From which beautiful diamonds are formed.
I made you the color of oil,
The Black gold that keeps people warm.

I made you from the rich, dark earth
That grows the food you need.
Your color’s the same as the panther’s
Known for (HER) beauty and speed.

Your color’s the same as the Black stallion,
A majestic animal is he.
No! I didn’t make you in the Image of darkness
I made you in the Likeness of Me!

All the colors of a Heavenly Rainbow
Can be found throughout every nation;
And when all those colors were blended well,

Your hair is the texture of lamb’s wool;
Such a humble, little creature is he.
I am the Shepherd who watches them.
I am the One who will watch over thee.

You are the color of midnight skies,
I put the stars’ glitter in your eyes.
There’s a smile hidden behind your pain,
That’s the reason your cheeks are high.

You are the color of dark clouds
Formed during my strongest winters in December.
I made your lips full so
When you kiss the one you love…they’ll remember.

Your stare is strong; your bone structure,
Thick….to withstand the burdens of time.
The reflection you see in the mirror…
The Image looking back at you is MINE!

So in answer to all of your questions,
And to forgive you for all of your flack;
These are the reasons, I THE LORD

Happy black History Month #blacklivesmatter #neverforget #sayhername #majesticindeed

Black History Month – Day 28


Carol Moseley Braun (8/16/1947 – current)

First African American woman elected to US Senate (Illinois); represented Illinois from 1993 – 1999. She was the first black female senator, the first black female Democratic senator, first woman to defeat an incumbent US Senator, first female senator from IL. From 1999-2001 she was the US Ambassador to New Zealand. She was a candidate for nomination for the 2004 US Presidential election and lost the 2011 election for Chicago mayor to Rahm Emanuel. She currently runs her private law firm and has launched a line of organic food called Ambassador Organics. She is also a member of Delta Sigma Theta.

Black History Month – Day 27


Dr. Joycelyn Elders (8/13/1933 – current)


First black appointed Surgeon General of the US Born to sharecroppers in Arkansas, Minne Lee Jones was the eldest of eight kids. She was also the valedictorian of her graduating class. She received a BS in Biology from Philander Smith College, where she also became a member of Delta Sigma Theta. She was a nurse’s aid in Milwaukee and served three years in the Army. She got her MD from U of AR and her MS in Biochemistry 7 years later.

She supported contraceptive distribution in school and possibility of drug legalization. She was appointed under the Clinton Administration in 1993.